A Speccy Man has a Breakdown: start here

In March 2026 I started sending a short daily email documenting the making of a new book. I’m still going.

The book is a hardback containing some of ~300 drawings I made in a psychiatric hospital in 2018, at a time when I genuinely believed I was worthless. It’s the origin story of a character called the Speccy Man – long-faced, a bit lost, trying to find his way. The drawings are raw. Some are funny. Most are not.

The emails are about the book and what went into making it – the breakdown, the drawings, the decision to publish, and what it costs to put something this personal into the world.

Some people reading these emails know me. Some have heard me talk about this before. Some are curious about the process of making a book. Some, I know, have experience of the dark places I write about.

A few posts to start with

If you’d like to read a little before deciding what to do next, here are seven entry points – not in any particular order:

• Original invitation to readers – what this project is and why
• Smiling in every photo. Wishing I was dead. – the emotional centre
• Why I hate talking about this – and can’t stop
• What £45 actually pays for – the book itself, in detail
• Thank you to these people who have pre-ordered – the readers who’ve already bought one
• Making the book, on a difficult day
• Falling into a padded envelope – a recent one

Or see the full list further down this page.

What you might do next

You’re welcome to read and move on. If you’d like to follow along, there are three things you could do, in any combination:

Sign up for the daily emails. They’re short, and each comes with an audio version if you’d rather listen. Already on my main newsletter list? Please sign up here too – this is a separate list.

Buy the book. It’s a limited first edition of 250 numbered, signed hardback copies, with a signed A5 art print included. £45 plus shipping. Buying options and shipping costs are here.

Just keep an eye on the site. New posts continue to appear. You can come back whenever.

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The full list of posts so far: