The woman who left her husband because of me

Many ideas grow better when transplanted into another mind than in the one where they sprang up Oliver Wendell Holmes Jnr

A few weeks ago, a couple approached me at the end of a public event. They were about my own age, but looked lovestruck like teens.

The woman told me that they had been to an event I ran about 12 months previously, and that I had changed her life. Because she was smiling as she said this, I said I was delighted to hear it.

But when she went into detail I felt a momentary panic. She said I had asked a question that made her leave her husband.


The question I had asked, she said, was “What conversations are you not having, with yourself and with others?”

I'm not going to guess how that question had such an effect on her. But it did. She said she went home, thought about it, and left her husband. And now she had a new partner – this man she had met at my class.

He was standing before me, and he too was beaming.

Ask yourself the same question

Every day, we say things and ask questions that can produce the most incredible effects on others – and often we have no idea that we are doing it.

You might have done it already today.

If you don't think you have done it, perhaps that same question might help you to find the right place to have some impact.

What conversations are YOU not having, with yourself and with others?